Nobody Said It Would Be Easy...
...and if they did, they lied.
We've all met those people that seem to have it easy, all of the time. Those folks that try something for the first time and just seem to master it immediately; those people that always seem to be the ones that find a $20 bill while walking on the sidewalk or that always seem to catch all the green lights when driving through traffic. They never have to work as hard as others or suffer the same frustrations. I read something a while back from my friends over at Go Fast Don't Die and they said it like this- "comparison is the thief of joy." I read that a few times and just, let it sink in.
Comparison is the thief of joy.
Comparison truly is the thief of joy.
It.
Is.
Exhausting.
Instincts, Built Right In
We can't help ourselves... it's instinctive. I won't get into the science of it, but basically, at the core of it, we are at the top of the evolutionary food chain and we know it, so we are always looking at those around us that pose the most competition to our dominance. Like I said... it's science.
But what happens when you compare yourselves to someone else? If you're doing better than them, then you feel dominant... as if you're succeeding at life, more than them. You no longer see them as a threat; you feel dominant. But, what happens when you compare yourself to someone who is doing better than you? You, instinctively, see them as a threat. But a threat to what? We have evolved to the point where food is readily available for all of us. For the vast majority of the world's population, shelter is readily available. So, if your neighbor has a nicer car, or a bigger house... how in the hell is he a threat to you?
Bottom line- he's not.
Turns out, you are you're own worst enemy when you are constantly comparing yourself to others. So, what's the solution? If it's instinctive, then can't it be inferred that it's out of our control? Let me pose this question to you- if, it is instinctive and we can't control the instincts to compete... or compare... why can't we do it in a way that is actually constructive? Why can't we compete against ourselves? Is there some rule that we have to compare ourselves to our neighbor's success, or can we compare our own progress today against our own progress from yesterday, then strive for a better result tomorrow?
Comparison is the thief of joy... mainly because we are doing it wrong. We need to compare ourselves against ourselves.
Let me ask you this- when you first straddled a motorcycle... as in... literally, the very first time... didn't you have to learn how to ride it? Each time you mounted up on that machine, didn't you get better and better with each subsequent ride? If you have had your job for a while, didn't you start in an entry-level position (or at least, something close to it)? If you just started your job, don't you hope to advance? Just like learning to walk required learning fundamental building blocks, so does each step you take in life. We've all heard the old adage of "you've got to learn to crawl before you walk... then after you learn to walk, you can learn to run." It's all about taking small steps in order to be able to make long strides, toward our own individual success.